Yesterday I had my visit with my oncologist. He is such a kind, soft spoken doctor. Never making me feel rushed. Always giving me time to absorb what he is saying and waiting on any questions I might have. We had the conversation again about follow up tests after treatment is finished. He told me once again that current studies suggest to have scans or tests only once or twice a year because if it came back somewhere it would be a stage 4 and not curable. Then they would scan only if there were symptoms. He said some people like to have scans after treatment for peace of mind if there are no obvious tumors seen on a scan. But it doesn't stop the possibility of cancer cells floating around, not seen on the scan.
I have thought about this a lot and decided I'd rather have the scans when I'm finished just to see where I stand. If they all come back clean then I can know that there is not an immediate problem. I realize that cancer cells could still be floating around, but somehow clean scans will make the treatment process for the last 9 months seem worth while. Kind of a temporary reward.
I had to have labs drawn today and I was a bit nervous about that since they can't draw from the left arm because of the clot and can't put a tourniquet on the right because of the lymph node surgery. But this lady was the best. One stick, without a tourniquet, and she had the labs. Boy was I happy. Radiation went well with more new markings. This time with blue marker. Sadira said if I bring in the orange marker, they'll do the next ones in orange. Just in time for Gator football season to start!!
As I was driving back after radiation, the radio was on a station with one of the talk show hosts. He was talking about the passing of Ted Kennedy this morning. As I listened for a moment, it became quite evident that he didn't like the political icon. But regardless of his view, I was dumbfounded by one of his statements. The point he was making was that, when he dies some people won't like him either, and will have negative things to say about him. His exact words were, "When I die, if I end up meeting that "great celestial valet" ........and he went on to voice his opinions. "That great celestial valet???" What is that all about? Is he talking about heaven? Where there will be no more darkness, no pain, no sorrow, no diseases, no death, no tears? The place where we will live for all eternity?
Is God Almighty the "valet" of whom he is speaking? The one who created us, who loved us, who gave His only son to die for us so that we could live forever in spite of our sinful nature?
Try as I might, I just cannot liken my entrance in heaven, to the parking of a car at a restaurant. I cannot picture my Lord as a car valet. No, when I meet Him face to face, I will not hand Him my car keys. I will run, with tears of joy, into His waiting arms and there I will stay forever and ever!!!
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
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